My Moonlight
by Salazar Marvolo
Summary: What would happen if Ichigo became the new lieutenant of Division 5? Will his Feelings for Shinji finally be heard? Or: How a guitar and some rumors changed it all. Ichigo x Shinji; Sequel to 'My Sunshine'. Can be read independently! Rated T for swearing. Please R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**My Moonlight**

Ichigo stepped into the Soul Society, the sun was as blinding as always with only a few clouds on the sky. This was the second time he had come to the Soul Society after getting his powers back. The first time being to get Ginjo's Body and give him a proper burial in the world of the living. This time he had come to give the old man his answer. He had been offered a place among the Gotei thirteen, as lieutenant of squad five. The old man had given him three months' time to consider the offer before coming to a decision. And a decision he had made. There was nothing in the world of the living that he could possibly want. He didn't have any plans for the future, he had had the vague thought about becoming a doctor and taking over his father's clinic but other than that he had no idea what to do with his life. His friends knew what to do. Ishida and Inoue had started dating a few weeks ago and Chad had started his training to become a professional boxer. So Ichigo had used the time in the world of the living to settle his business and say goodbye to his friends, he would visit them of course, but most of them still broke down in tears at his goodbye. (Mainly meaning Keigo who straight out refused to let go of Ichigo for a good ten minutes, until Mizuiro and Chad pried him off a very annoyed but also slightly amused Ichigo.)

Ichigo stretched his hands over his head lazily and made his way trough the very familiar streets of Sereitei, any intruders would have had a problem to distinguish between the many twists and turns but Ichigo had been here enough to know his way around.

Still it seemed like a lifetime ago that he had roamed those streets with Uryu, Chad, Orihime and Yoruichi on their quest to free Rukia. He smiled at the memory of their brash entrance. Other memories of his lonely days after he lost his powers had soon been overshadowed and slowly faded into the back of his mind. Still sometimes he caught himself singing the familiar tune that reminded him so much of his love for a certain blond haired Vizard, who would very soon become his Captain. Another reason why he had made his decision as soon as the offer had left the old mans mouth. He had thought that he would never be able to even see Shinji again. Now he was offered a place right at his side for the rest of his life or until he was offered his own seat as a Captain, which he would likely turn down if it meant staying close to Shinji. His heart gave a little thud at the thought of seeing Shinji again. The first time he had seen him, the first time he had been back to Soul Society, the air in his lungs seemed to be gone for a few seconds before he collected himself again and stated what he had come for. Still the urge to reach for him and engulf him in a hug had been almost unbearably strong. He had held back as best as he could, he knew he had to get his act together if he didn't want to make himself a fool in front of his long-term crush and soon to be Captain.

He was quickly ripped out of his thoughts by the sight of the first division barracks in front of him. Grinning he quickly made his way through the corridors until he reached the door he knew would lead to the Head captains Office. Raising his knuckles, he knocked three times and waited. He didn't need to wait long until a deep gravely voice called form the inside. "Come in." Not wasting any time Ichigo confidently opened the door and looked to the right where he knew the Captain Commanders desk to be located. The head captain was standing in front of the enormous windows overlooking all Sereitei with his back turned to Ichigo. "Ichigo Kurosaki. Have you come to a decision?" The head captain asked half turning around to look at Ichigo with one of his very sharp and way to knowing eyes. Ichigo smirked to cover up his nervousness. "Yeah…Through something tells me you already know my answer." Ichigo said, smirk turning into a grin while the Head captain only shook his head and uttered a "Hrmpf." "Yes, I am willing to take on the position you offered me." Ichigo told him, answering in a more mature way. "Very well, I take it you have already settled your business in the Real World." At Ichigos nod Yamamoto gave him an approving look and chocked his head to the side in thought. He turned back to the window and motioned for Ichigo to join him.

They stood there for a few moments in silence, Ichigo unsure as to why the head Captain hadn't simply dismissed him but not willing to disturb him in his contemplation. Finally, the head captain gave a long-suffering sigh, letting his head sink forward a little, making him look even more ancient than he probably was. "You have changed us, Ichigo Kurosaki." Ichigo gave him a confused and slightly taken aback look. Obviously feeling Ichigos confusion the Head captain readily elaborated. "Your brashness, your pure will to fight and protect has moved the hearts of many Soul reapers. Your actions have made them respect you, your feelings have reached them and now most of the Captains in the Gotei thirteen would readily lay down their lives for you." At the thought Ichigo shifted uncomfortably and his frown deepened.

He had no idea that most of them felt this way about him, sure he was friends with some of them but he very much doubted that the likes of Mayuri or Soi Fon would so much as lift a finger if he was in danger. His doubt must have shown on his face for the Head captain gave an amused little chuckle. "As I said, most of them." Ichigo blushed at the Head Captains easily reading his thoughts. "I have enough experience around people to mostly guess what they are thinking, do not concern yourself with this." The head captain told him, amusement evident in his voice. "When you first came here, we were sure that we would end up killing you. I was sure that we would end up killing you. That is why I have said that you changed us, Ichigo Kurosaki. We have let those who were part of Aizens experiments back into their old ranks, we have done our utmost to give back power to someone who lost it by protecting the Sereitei and its inhabitants as well as the world of the living." Ichigo was unsure how to take all that…praise?

He wasn't sure whether it was praise or maybe the Head captain's assessment of the situation evolving around Ichigos continuous meddling in Soul Society affairs. "I did what I had to do to protect my friends. The way you make it sound…It sounds all heroic or something I am not. All I ever do and all I ever want to do is….to protect those most important to me. I didn't fight for the Soul Society back then. I fought for my friends. And well some of my friends just so happened to be living in Soul Society." Ichigo said, stopping at some points to better formulate the way he saw things. The Head captain gave a raspy chuckle. "I guess that is the sort of man you are, Ichigo Kurosaki." Ichigo pulled a face at being called by his full name once again. "In all honesty…and I don't mean to offend you…but could you drop the whole Ichigo Kurosaki kind of thing? I mean I am going to be part of the Gotei Thirteen. And most of the people here already call me Ichigo, why not you?" Ichigo asked bravely, trying his best to not piss of the man who could very easily burn him into a pile of Ichigo shaped ash on the floor.

The Head captain turned to him. "As head captain it would be inappropriate to call you by your given name." He said with a frown, as if he couldn't believe he would have to explain such a concept to Ichigo. "Yeah…alright I understand that…But could you at least say Kurosaki of something? I mean even Byakuya has finally started using my given name and he has a stick so far up his –"Ichigo quickly stopped talking when he realized what he was about to say, and more importantly, who he was talking to right now. To his astonishment the head captain didn't seem to mind. "I would recommend not using that sort of tone in the future, Captain Kuchiki is going to outrank you. If it is your wish I shall address you as Lieutenant Kurosaki from now on." Ichigo quietly released the breath he had been holding. "I am sure Byakuya won't expect anything else but me keeping up on calling him by his given name." Ichigo told the Head Captain with a grin.

Yamamoto looked at him for a few seconds but apparently didn't seem to have the energy left to set his attitude straight. "What I meant to tell you…Lieutenant Kurosaki is that…I am…glad you have decided to join our ranks." Ichigo was not prepared for that, nor had he expected to hear something like that from anyone, especially not from the head captain himself. "I – uhh – I- am glad to be able to stay here." He finally got out, remembering some of his manners and the ability to speak. "Very well. You are dismissed, go to your new barracks at once, I will send a hell butterfly ahead to let your Captain know that a replacement for Lieutenant Hinamori has been found. And do not forget your badge." The head captain said, gesturing at his desk where the fifth division lieutenant badge was located.

Ichigo nodded, took the badge from the desk and bowed before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him quietly. The last few minutes almost seemed unreal to him. The head captain being glad he had joined, that was a new one. Looking down at the badge he quickly strapped it to his left biceps. Straitening his shoulders Ichigo quickened his pace and burst through the huge double doors to get outside, he quickly looked around before shunpoing of into the direction of his new barracks.

He came to a skipping halt in front of the fifth division barracks. He took a deep breath through his nose before entering. A few Soul reapers were sweeping the floor, another group was surrounding a small table and were playing some sort of game, not wanting to draw attention to himself he concentrated and followed the powerful surge of reiatsu he could feel coming from the first floor. He quickly made his way up the stairs and around one corner, when he suddenly saw a door burst open not even one foot in front of him.

Shinji had ripped the door open and seemed to look incredibly surprised, a hell butterfly could be seen leaving the room behind him. Seemed like the massage that he would get a new lieutenant had reached him. Ichigo grinned at Shinjis perplex and taken aback form. "Yo, Hirako-taichou. Got the good news I see." Ichigo said. Shinji seemed to have finally grasped the situation and couldn't hold back his trademark grin making itself known on his face. "Really Ichigo, give a man a warning, would ya?" Ichigo snorted a little. "Nahh, to good an opportunity to let it pass." Shinji shook his head a little at him. "So, does that mean you are staying for good?" Shinji asked stepping aside a little to let Ichigo into his office.

"Well yeah, I guess, as long as you will have me that is." Suddenly feeling a little unsure about springing this surprise on Shinji. He finally also took the time to drink in Shinjis appearance, he had seen him three months ago but that had been for a disappointingly short amount of time, now he had the chance to take in the changes Shinji had gone through during the last two years.

He couldn't help the happy thud his heart gave at seeing him again, nor could he help the feeling of butterflies filling his stomach like he was a little girl with a crush on the coolest guy in school. Shinji had kept his fringe the way Aizen had cut it off during the war, he still wore the white strip of cloth, which was bound like a necktie, around his neck, his captain haori seemed a little on the bulkier side, giving his back the look of being broader than it actually was. Ichigo quickly looked away when he noticed that he had been looking at Shinji longer than a normal person would. "Well I guess I should introduce you to the rest." Shinji told him. He gestured for Ichigo to follow him down the corridor. They were standing on the second-floor form which you had a nice look down on the Soul reapers of division fife bustling about their day.

"Attention everybody! We finally got a new Lieutenant!" Shinji yelled loudly getting their attention. They all looked up and saw Ichigo standing two steps behind Shinji, wearing the badge of lieutenant of the fifth, they quickly broke out into excited whispers at having _the_ Ichigo Kurosaki as their lieutenant. "Quiet! As some of you might know, this is Ichigo Kurosaki, from now on he will be your lieutenant. You will treat him the same way you treat me. Understood?" Shinji asked, strictness in his voice. Ichigo couldn't help but feel in awe at Shinjis easy way to control the masses of Soul reapers following him. "Alright, back to work everybody!"

The Soul reapers quickly went back to their tasks and Shinji brought Ichigo back to his office once again. "Your desk is the one over there, already completely empty and all, we got some paperwork to do, if you don't know how to fill our some of the forms tell me and I'll explain it ta ya. Everything clear? Ahh and don't worry I'll show ya around the barracks later today, right now most of the Shinigami are out and about, so I'd say we wait till it is less crowded." Ichigo nodded at that and took the huge amount of papers from Shinji. He knew that being lieutenant would entail this, he had heard Renji complain about it enough to know that. He sat down at his desk and began to work trough the piles of papers. Most of them were self-explanatory so Ichigo didn't have a hard time with these, the trickier ones he first tried himself and only when he was at the end of his wits did he turn to Shinji to ask him. A few hours later they were done with the work, Shinji stretched his arms over his head and Ichigo couldn't help but admire the way his haori sleeves slid down to his elbows and showed off his muscular underarms. _Wow_ , he couldn't help but think, _admiring underarms…how the mighty have fallen. How pathetic can I get?_

"Well that's it for today. Come on I'll show you everything and the room you'll be staying in." Shinji said, walking over to the door. Ichigo nodded quickly and got up to follow him. They went to the training grounds, the cafeteria, the bathrooms, the common room and lastly the sleeping barracks. "Ours are right this way." Shinji said gesturing to a corridor that was slightly separated from the rest of the barracks. They passed a breathtakingly beautiful garden which Ichigo couldn't help but gape at, before Shinji came to an abrupt halt. "This one is mine." He said gesturing to the door in front of him. "Yours is just the door down there. I trust it ya won't get lost on yer way to yer room, right?" Shinji asked him dryly. Ichigo glared at him halfheartedly. "No, I won't. Goodnight, Hirako-taichou." Ichigo said. "Gee, stop that." Shinji suddenly called. Ichigo turned around from where he has set about going to his room. "Stop what?" he asked confusedly. "The whole 'Hirako-taichou' crap. It was Shinji right from the start Ichigo. Why stop now?" Ichigo grinned at him. "Alright. See you tomorrow, Shinji." "Yeah yeah, night Ichigo."

Ichigo slid the door to his room open and was met with a mostly bare tatami clad room. A desk, a little cabinet and a futon was all the room currently housed. He stretched and stepped inside. He was glad Urahara had agreed to bring some of his stuff. He wouldn't be able to live without his guitar. Stepping out of his clothes and only keeping his underwear and Shirt on, which he had worn beneath his Shinigami attire, he slipped into the futon and was out like a light.

* * *

Several Months later.

Ichigo had settled in nicely in the fifth division, the faces of his friends when they had been introduced to the new lieutenant of the fifth had been hilarious. Rukia had kicked him in the head for not telling her, but seeing their surprised faces was more than worth it. He had even made Shinji laugh, he was with Ichigo when he was first announced as lieutenant and had spent 5 minutes rolling on the floor in laughter at the shocked faces around them. It had made the bruise on his head throb a little less at the sight. Ichigo felt a grin strech across his face at the Memory, before quickly snapping back into reality and fastening his pace beack to the Office. "Shinji, I got some more papers from the sixth for you to si-" Ichigo stopped mid-sentence, papers still outstreched in one hand.

Shinji was sleeping, sprawled over the couch on the left side of the room. His left arm was dangling to the floor and his hair was covering half of his face. His usual grin was nowhere to be seen. Ichigo stared at the sight in front of him. He had never seen Shinji look so unguarded, his face looked even younger in his sleep betraying the hundreds of years he was old. Silently making his way over, Ichigo slid the papers onto Shinjis desk, he looked back at the sleeping form of his crush. Sighing softly Ichigo walked over to the cupboard behind his desk and pulled out a blanket. He spread it out and walked over towards Shinji. He covered him, careful not to wake him up. And tucked the blanked in around him a little.

He swallowed heavily. Seeing Shinji like this really wasn't fair on Ichigo. His heart gave a painful squeeze at the thought of the man lying in front of him with his defenses all down. Ichigo couldn't help it, he lifted his hand and softly brushed Shinjis hair out of his face, drawing back like he had been burned he quickly walked to his desk and started doing his work, not once did he give into the urge to look at his sleeping captain. A shame too, if he had he would have noticed Shinjis eyes opening almost immediately after Ichigo had brushed back his hair and would have seen the scarlet blush that settled over his face and ears at Ichigos caress.

Another month flew by and Ichigo still couldn't get Shinjis sleeping form out of his head. Thinking about it made him excited and regretful all at once. Excited because he had gotten to see Shinji in such a state, and regretful because he hadn't used his chance to finally kiss the man, as shameful as doing something like that might have been. At least he had some way of distracting himself, Urahara had brought him some of his things, including his guitar. So, when Ichigo wasn't running around, training newbie's or filling our paperwork he could be found on top of Sogyoku hill, or in the gardens of the fifth division playing his guitar. He wasn't aware of the rumors surrounding his person and now also his playing.

Apparently, some Soul Reapers had heard him play once when he had played in the garden, they had been fascinated by the beautiful sounds, it didn't help that Ichigo also sang to his playing. Soon the Soul Society was abuzz with the news that Ichigo Kurosaki was not only a war hero, incredibly good looking and powerful, as well as the youngest member of the Soul Society, but also a very talented singer. Especially the Shinigami Woman Association couldn't help but fawn over him as soon as Ichigo stepped into a room, to top it of he wasn't even aware of the longing stares of most of the female and male population of the Seireitei. They had of course noticed how much he had grown up into a man during his two-year absence, but they hadn't expected him to become this handsome. His behavior also seemed to be more subdued, he wasn't as brash as before, a calm aura had settled over him and his surroundings. And Ichigo was completely unaware of any of that.

Of course, Shinji didn't stay unaware of the rumors. He happened upon them on one of the nights he spent drinking and talking with Ukitake and Kyoraku. "So, Shinji, heard the news surrounding your lieutenant?" Kyoraku had asked him with a grin. Shinji had raised his brow in confusion. "News?" He asked. Ukitake smiled slightly at Shinji. "Well, it seems he has managed to capture the attention of most of Soul Society." Shinji had snorted at that. "Isn't he always?" He had asked a little dryly, but still in good humor. "No, not in that way. Seems like he is rather popular with the ladies these days." Kyoraku said, pouting a little at Ichigos stardom.

Shinji had looked at them disbelievingly. "What? Has he got himself a girlfriend or something?" Kyoraku had now shaken his head at his friend's slowness. "What is going on with you today Shinji? We are trying to tell you that Ichigo has become hot topic number one. Everybody seems to want him to themselves, I swear I saw Matsumoto-kun drooling at the sight of him once." Kyoraku told him in his usual exuberant way. Ukitake chuckled a little at his friend's antics. "Seems he is also quite the talented singer from what I've heard." Shinji had looked at them wide eyed. "Singing? That's a new one." Shinji was well aware of Ichigos appearances, he had spent the last few months in his company, only an Idiot would say that the kid hadn't grown up into an incredibly handsome man. His orange hair was longer now, his chocolate brown eyes were always alight with kindness and determination. He had grown taller, surpassing Shinji by a few inches, his shoulders had become broader too. All in all, it was no wonder that the rest of Soul Society had finally started looking at Ichigo as a man and no longer as a kid. A powerful kid who deserved to be respected, but still a kid back then. "Yeah." Ukitake had interrupted his thoughts. "Apparently he can also be found singing in the gardens of your division sometimes." He had told him with a smile. "I'd love to hear it, he really is quite good from what I've heard." And that last sentence was what intrigued Shinji.

During the last few days he had tried to find Ichigo singing in the garden, but whenever he looked, he wasn't there. Finally, having had enough he simply followed Ichigos Reiatsu trail, which led him, surprisingly, to the top of Sogyoku Hill. He had refrained from following him before in fear of being noticed, also spying on his lieutenant was bad enought but to follow him around the whole Seireitei. Eventually everybody reaches their breaking point and Shinjis patience had simply run out. He stopped under the cover of a few trees and looked upon the open field in front of him. He covered his Reiatsu, wrapping it tightly around him. Ichigo was sitting on a rock, guitar placed in front of him and strumming softly. Taking a few steps forward Shinji was finally able to hear his voice.

 _\- my sunshine, my only sunshine  
You make me happy when skies are grey  
You never know, dear, how much I love you  
Please don't take my sunshine away_

 _The other night dear, as I lay sleeping_

 _I dreamed I held you in my arms_

 _But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken_

 _So, I hung my head and I cried._

 _You are my sunshine, my only sunshine  
You make me happy when skies are grey  
You never know, dear, how much I love you  
Please don't take my sunshine away  
_

 _Please don't take my sunshine away_

 _Please don't take my sunshine away._

Shinji was surprised at Ichigos choice of a song. When he broke out of the trance the song had put him under, he realized that Ichigo was shaking softly. Shinji was confused as to what was going on at first until Ichigo turned halfway around to place his guitar back into its bag which was placed slightly behind him.

Ichigos eyes were reddened and a few tears slid down his cheeks, he wiped angrily at them. "Pathetic Kurosaki." He heard Ichigo talking to himself. "Freaking two years. Two years. Fuck!" Shinji was a little surprised at Ichigos anger. He saw him sit up quickly and pace furiously. "Damnit! Damnit! Why him? Why the hell do I have to be in love with freaking Hirako Shinji?!" The last part was almost yelled in frustration. Shinjis eyes widened, before he could stop to think about what he was doing he has stepped out of the cover of the trees, when Ichigo turned around to start another round of angry pacing his eyes fell on Shinji. His face instantly lost all color. He opened his mouth as if to say something, utterly horrified at Shinjis sudden appearance, he closed his mouth again, unable to speak.

Shinji was still staring at him. He couldn't help it. Ichigo Kurosaki in love with him?! That was…That was…. entirely unexpected. He cleared his throat a little. He had to say something, anything to make this in any way better for Ichigo. Why the hell had he even stepped out from the trees? "Ichigo…" Ichigo flinched a little and looked down onto the floor, decidedly not meeting Shinjis eyes. "Is…is that ture?" He had to hear it again, had to have it confirmed. He was aware on what kind of reaction Ichigos appearance got these days and he wasn't immune to it. He simply hid his attraction, but this was something else. Ichigo loved him. What Shinji felt was attraction and lust…but love?

"I-" Ichigo finally found his voice again. Shinji suddenly saw how Ichigos head snapped up. His trademark frown in place and determination in his eyes. "Yes." His eyes softened a fraction when he said his next sentence. "I love you." Ichigo told him firmly, unwavering eyes set on Shinji. Shinji felt the air leave his lungs, being told in this fashion was decidedly different. He didn't love Ichigo…not yet…but gazing at this face, looking into those eyes…he knew he would. He could already feel it, the slow pull in the pit of his stomach that turned attraction into so much more.

Before he could stop his feet he quickly covered the space between him and Ichigo, coming to a halt a few centimeters in front of his face. Ichigo looked surprised, his eyes had widened comically at Shinjis closeness. "I-I can't say it back, Ichigo." Ichigo looked down, he had known that much, it was one-sided love after all. "Not yet." Shinji added softly. Ichigo looked up, surprise again evident in his eyes. "Y-You mean?" Ichigo asked, sounding more unsure than Shinji had ever heard him before. He cleared his throat again. "I-I would be willing to try…If you want to that is." Shinji said, he felt nervous, why did he feel nervous?

"I-. "Ichigo broke of and looked at the ground, he looked up, quickly gazed at Shinjis face and looked to the side, a blush was slowly creeping over his face covering his cheeks and ears. "Yes." He said quietly. Shinji let out a breath he hadn't known he had been holding. He took in Ichigos blush and could feel his heart quicken at the sight. Yes, falling in love with Ichigo Kurosaki would be very easy. Slowly he stepped even closer to Ichigo. He reached out with his hand and lifted Ichigos chin with his finger, making him look at Shinji. His blush was even deeper, but he wasn't pulling away, taking that as his cue Shinji slowly leaned towards Ichigos face.

Their lips were separated by a hairsbreath, he could feel Ichigos breath on his face, could almost feel the nervousness radiation off him. He leaned forward a fraction and covered Ichigos lips with his own, it was the softest kiss of his lifetime. Ichigos lips were sweet and hesitant, his heart beneath Shinjis fingers, from where he had placed them on his chest, was beating irregularly and fast. They broke the kiss, Shinji pulled back a fraction and looked at Ichigos face, he really wished he hadn't. The blush was full force now, Ichigos eyes were slightly glazed over and his lips looked even more pink and kissable then before. And how was Shinji supposed to resist that?

He quickly pulled Ichigo closer, covered his lips more hungrily than before. Ichigo quickly caught on, getting lost in the passion he had had to suppress for all these years. His fingers threaded into Shinjis hair and softly pulled at it, while his other hand snaked around Shinjis lower back to close any remaining distance between them. He put all his feelings into the kiss, all his loneliness, his love, his heartbreak. He kissed with the passion of a man who whished for only one taste of the lips of his true love and Shinji could feel it all. It was nearly overwhelming, he could feel himself getting swept away by Ichigos passion. Strangely enough, he had no problem with that at all. They finally broke away. Shinji was slightly out of breath, but he knew that Ichigo wasn't off much better. Shinji pulled out of Ichigos embrace and took his hand. He pulled him down to sit on the stone Ichigo had sat on before. "Sorry." Ichigo said softly. "What are you apologizing for?" Shinji asked him completely taken aback. "Uh...kind of got carried away…with the…uh…kiss." Ichigo said shyly. Shinji chuckled softly. "And you think you were the only one?" Shinji asked him softly. Ichigo quickly looked up and was surprised by the soft look Shinji gave him. "I meant what I said Ichigo. I want to try this. And in all honesty…I don't think it will take me long…until I can say it back." Ichigo looked at Shinji and almost couldn't believe what he was hearing, joy filled him. He had never, in his life felt this light before. "Ichigo…Can I ask you something?" Ichigo nodded quickly. "How long…have you felt this way…?" Ichigo looked down. "It-It started shortly after we met." He admitted quietly. "Two years huh…?" Shinji said. Ichigo nodded, thought Shinjis question needed no answer. "The song you sang before. It was really beautiful." Shinji quickly said trying to change the topic to something more carefree…Until he remembered that Ichigo was crying while playing it…He winced at his own slip up. Ichigo smiled a painfilled little smile. "My mom used to sing it to my sisters and me when we couldn't sleep…I started singing it again some time ago, because it reminded me of-." At that Ichigo broke off. The unspoken _You_ was hanging heavy in the air. "Sunshine…" Shinji suddenly said. "I remind you of sunshine?" He asked Ichigo softly. Ichigo nodded another blush covering his face. "Well I guess if I am sunshine…you are the moonlight." Ichigo looked at Shinji completely taken aback by his statement. Shinji couldn't remember the last time he had said something this sappy and meant every word. "Sunshine and moonlight…" Ichigo said with a smile. "I like it." Shinji grinned his trademark grin and laid an arm around Ichigo shoulder pulling him closer. "Me too."


	2. Chapter 2

It has been six months now since Ichigo 'confessed' his feelings to Shinji. He still wasn't sure whether the whole incident was just his extremely bad luck or a godsent gift. Shinji was nice, he was friendly, and he was attentive. But nothing much had changed between them. A few kisses and pecks, but Shinji never pushed for more, to the outside world they were still superior/subordinate and friends.

And Ichigo didn't know how to deal with that. With a sigh he let his head fall forward, onto the huge pile of unfinished paperwork stacked in front of him. A blue cloud of gloom settled over his head as he continued to bemoan his fate. Shinji still hadn't given him any inclination towards his feelings. It was all so unfair really.

Ichigo wanted to tell Shinji he loved him on so many occasions. There had been a festival a few weeks ago, they had decided to go together, something Ichigo had been extremely excited and happy about. They had stood together among the other couples, which were holding each other close, whispering words of love as they watched the fireworks in awe. Yet Ichigo couldn't even bring himself to grab ahold of Shinjis hand. The chances that anybody would have noticed were extremely slim, it was crowded and dark and nobody had paid any attention on anything besides the firework. It would have been so easy to catch Shinjis hand and whisper into his ear, confessing the feelings, that weighted heavier on his tongue the longer he went without telling them, once more.

As if he wasn't already on a rollercoaster of emotions of uncertainty and self-doubt he also felt so incredibly selfish. He was together with the person he loved unconditionally, and they were fine with dating him and yet he wanted more. He wanted to touch Shinji without having to fear a rebuttal, he wanted to tell him he loved him without having to fear that the answer to his feelings was silence, or even worse, rejection. But how do you tell these fears to the person they are about. Impossible, absolutely impossible. He sighed again.

"Ichigo, what is this sighing all about, ya are only seventeen, right? No reason to sigh like an old man." A voice drawled from the direction of the door. Moving his head slowly around, the gloom still heavily pulling at it, Ichigos eyes settled on the form of the man that was the cause of his sighing to begin with. Shinji stood in the doorway, arms crossed and leaning onto the doorframe. His face showed a mix between annoyance and worry. "Shiiinjiiii…." Ichigo whined a little uncharacteristically. He had to make a good excuse for his sorry state. Paperwork, paperwork was always the best excuse. "Help me with this. It's impossible to finish all this on my own." Ichigo said, desperately wanting Shinji to believe his excuse.

Shinji huffed a little air out and shrugged. "Can't be helped, it would look bad if I let my Fukutaichou hanging, now would it?" He asked, smile turning a little teasing, but Ichigo saw the relive in his eyes, that nothing serious was worrying Ichigo. Shinji walked over and snatched a few pieces of paperwork. They spend the rest of the evening in silence.

When they were finished, Ichigo turned nervous once again. He had managed to get Shinji to eat together with him on a few occasions, but he had faced rejection just as many times. Every evening was like playing the lottery for him. "Shinji, uhm would you like to join me for dinner?" Ichigo asked, trying his hardest to sound casual, he knew his acting skills were better than most people thought but with Shinji it was always harder for him to maintain his front. "Ahh, sorry I promised Ukitake and Kyoraku a night of drinking. Some other time maybe." Shinji said, not sounding bothered at all and just driving the spear deeper into Ichigos heart. "A-Alright. I'll see you tomorrow then. Greet them from me, will you?" Ichigo asked, bravely putting a smile on his face before hurrying out the door. Shinji raised his eyebrow a little but let it slide.

"-ji-kun! Shinji-kun!" Shinji was snapped out of his daze by a hand waving in front of his face and a loud voice. "Are you back with us?" Ukitake asked him a little amusedly. "Ah-yeah sorry. I was kind of distracted." Kyoraku raised an eyebrow. "We could tell." He told him with a chuckle. "Is anything bothering you?" Kyoraku asked then, leaning across the small table to inquire some more. "Work maybe? Family?" He leaned even further. "Trouble with your girlfriend maybe?" He asked then, a perverted grin stretching across his face. Shinji had frozen at the last statement. It was true he had been thinking about Ichigo. His vice lieutenant had been acting weirdly around him. No this wasn't about Ichigo being his subordinate, this was about Ichigo being his…lover? They hadn't done anything yet so maybe it was to soon to call them something like this. But they were going out…so boyfriends?

He didn't know what to do. He had never been with another man, not like this. Well technically he knew what to do, but he didn't know when. They had kissed on a few occasions. Nothing like they had done the first night they had gotten together, just a few pecks here and there. These types of kisses were easy, there didn't have to be any mood for them, Shinji could just lean across Ichigos desk in the middle of work and kiss his cheek or peck him on the mouth, no problem there.

No, the problem was that Shinji didn't know how or when to proceed. He didn't even know if Ichigo was ready to take their relationship to another level. Ichigo had also never initiated anything himself, Shinji couldn't remember a single occasion on which Ichigo had kissed him or anything the like. Maybe he didn't want to? Maybe he changed his mind? He also hadn't told him his feelings again. And if Ichigo didn't tell him once more Shinji couldn't respond properly.

He was ripped out of his thoughts again by Kyoraku looking at him in apparent surprise. "What's that? I was right? Maan-and I just wanted to tease you a little!" Ukitake also looked slightly taken aback. Shinji quickly lifted his hands, waving them in front of him in denial. "What?! No! I don't-I don't have a girlfriend. Don't be ridiculous." But even while saying that he knew that his face was totally unconvincing. Kyoraku raised his eyebrow again, not buying Shinji panicked dismissal at all.

Ukitake smiled at him kindly. "There is no need to lie to us Shinji-kun. We could help you, if you want to talk about it?" He asked him. Shinji sighed deeply, he wasn't ready to tell anyone about his relationship with Ichigo…but he could pretend that this was about some girl and him! He looked down and scratched his face a little. "Six months ago, someone confessed to me." He finally said. "Ehhh!?" Kyoraku said loudly. Ukitake looked surprised but didn't interrupt. "I-I hadn't thought of them like that until that point. Sure, they were attractive and all, but I never thought about anything serious with them." He stopped again.

He wasn't nearly drunk enough to spill all of this, with that thought in mind he quickly downed his sake before continuing. "I told them as much. But I-I proposed to try…I mean I can't just flip a switch to loving someone, ya know? Got to know the person a little better first. So, we've been going out for the last six months. A few dates, nothing much." Kyoraku was gaping at this point. But his perverted mind didn't keep quite for long. "Six months heh? So how far did you take it then?" He asked him, leering openly.

Ukitake frowned at him in disapproval. But quickly looked at Shinji when he sighed deeply. "That's the problem. Nowhere." Kyoraku blinked. Once. Twice. "Nowhere?" He asked in incredulity. "Nowhere." Shinji confirmed. "They also haven't initiated anything, all the times we kissed, all started by me. But that's not the worst of it…I really…I want to respond to them. Properly. So, three months ago when I finally was ready to tell them my feelings I figured I would wait until they tell me once again and then I would be able to respond in kind. But like this…I just don't know what to do." Shinji said, head meeting the surface of the table in his dismay.

Ukitake seemed to be deep in thought. "Not…to impose or anything. But have you tried showing them your feelings?" He asked him, earnestly looking at Shinji. "Eh?" Shinji asked, lifting his head of the table. "Feelings aren't just committed trough words, but gestures. I would imagine that it would be pretty hard on the person to tell their feelings once again if they had to fear rejection. Also, you already know their feelings Shinji, maybe they're just waiting for you to tell them." Ukitake said looking at Shinji a little seriously. Kyoraku also was no longer joking, he looked at Shinji, his eyes sharp and contemplating.

"I-I gotta go somewhere." Shinji finally said. Before Kyoraku or Ukitake could stop him, he was already out of the door, shunpoing across half the Seireitei. Ukitake blinked a little surprised at the empty seat in front of him. Kyorkau started chuckling next to him. "That's young love for you." He said before laughing some more. "Ahh! That reminds me we totally forgot to ask him who his girlfriend is!" He suddenly exclaimed loudly. "You don't think it's my lovely Nanao-chan do you?" He wailed, hugging Ukitake close while crying.

Shinji finally came to a halt in front of Ichigos room, he hadn't bothered to slow down when he was running through half the division in his desperation to get here. Ichigo must have felt him arrive because the door in front of Shinji opened and he saw Ichigo standing in front of him. He was wearing a soft pair of grey trousers and a black shirt and looked at Shinji in absolute surprise. "Shinji? What are you doi-?" That's as far as Ichigo got as Shinji swooped forward and pulled him into his arms, hugging him tightly.

Pulling back, he looked Ichigo in the eyes. "I love you!" he told him. Ichigo looked even more surprised, his eyes were as wide as saucers. Shinji hugged him close again. "I love you, Ichigo. I love you so much its almost painful." Ichigo reached out and buried his hands in Shinjis back, pulling him impossibly closer. "I love you too." He said. Letting his hands wander across his back he moved his hands to Shinjis face and cradled it. "Sorry, but I can't hold back right now." Ichigo told him.

Shinji was surprised by the intensity in his eyes, and the almost strained expression on his face as Ichigo swooped down and kissed him hungrily. Shinji held on in surprise as Ichigo looped one of his arms around Shinjis back and used the other one to run it through Shinjis hair. Their tongues met hotly, and Shinji could feel the fire burning inside of him. A heat he hadn't felt in a long time as they continued to kiss deeply. Finally, Ichigo broke away, both of them were gasping for breath.

"Sorry…" Ichigo said breathlessly, resting his forehead against Shinjis. "Was about time, dammit." Was Shinjis mumbled answer. "Huh?" Ichigo asked him, ever so eloquently. "Haven't you noticed? This is the first time you've kissed me." Shinji told him, pouting slightly. Ichigo rubbed his neck in embarrassment. "Uhm…eh…I didn't know whether you wanted me to. I mean you never really told me your feelings…and I was mostly the one to ask for dates." He broke of into a mumble.

Shinji reached out and gently caressed Ichigos cheek. "I'm sorry. I should have told you sooner. I was really an idiot." Shinji told him, huffing a laugh. "I thought you came to not like me anymore, not in this way at least." He confessed in a troubled voice. Ichigo pulled away in shock and surprise. "What?! That's impossible!" He yelled. His voice and eyes were so earnest while saying that that Shinji couldn't help but laugh. "Oi, don't laugh at me." Ichigo told him, blush spreading across his face as he realized what he had said. Shinji tried to suppress his laughter, but his shoulders still shook in mirth.

"Hahh, Ichigo…" Shinji mumbled as he leaned into his chest. "What is it?" Ichigo asked him softly. "We really are a bunch of idiots." Shinji told him, looking up at him with a smile. Ichigo chuckled a little and rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah…" Shinji shifted slightly, moving closer to Ichigo and burying himself in his arms. Ichigo blinked a little in surprise. "Ichigo?" Shinji asked softly. "Yeah?" Ichigo said, eyebrow arched as he looked down at the Vizard buried in his arms. "Can I stay the night?" Shinji asked him, his eyes were half lidded as he looked up at Ichigo. Ichigo felt a shudder whack his body, feelings hot and cold at once as Shinjis words registered in his mind. "Sure…" he said in a strained voice. And pulled Shinji closer to shut the door behind their entwined forms.

"Uhm…I have the feeling we shouldn't have seen this…" A random member of squad five said to another. Both were pressed close to the wall leading to the corridor of the ranked officer's quarters. The other member sweat dropped and nodded frantically. He grabbed the first member by the shoulders and looked deep into his eyes. "This never happened. We were never here. We saw nothing. Clear?" He asked him, shaking him to get his answer. The first member nodded. "Crystal clear." He said. They both tiptoed into the other direction never to speak of this ever again, to anyone. They valued their lives after all…and their Captain could be incredibly scary when he wanted to be. Not to mention their Vice Captain…


End file.
